(Continuation from yesterday)

Set it aside,

There is a phrase of "we have lost a person of much account", and I think this is an acid phrase.

What I am obsessed with is "what is an account of the person?"

I think that it is not about a pure and simple person, but skills, ideas, actions, works and services of the person.

As for me, I hear that "we have lost a person of much account" is the same phrase of "We want to use the person's skills for our profit."

Moreover I come to think it with evil emotion, I can reach a concept of "a person of less account"

Of course, I know that this is a kind of "misrepresentation",

in order to express condolences to a death person as an ordinal method.

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To think again, "a person of much account" will not make me happy, however,

"I was glad with him/her anytime"

"I wanted to enjoy talking more with him/her"

"I feel lonesome because he/she has gone"

I like the above phrases more than "a person of much account".

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However, I decided,

"I will stop thinking it anymore"

After my death, even if any criticism and disrespect against me, will be rather welcome,

in the less time than reading out "Ebata is dead"

everyone becomes to write out all memories of Ebata, as if Ebata hasn't existed from the start.

I know well that.

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"Why is Ebata confident about it ?"

Because I live my life with keeping deleting my memories like the above.