Smoke of tobacco is hard on me.

I care the smell, moreover I have slightly asthma and I am scared of falling ill.

It might to be hard to understand the frightfulness of breathing difficulty, unless you have asthma.

But I don't have deadly feeling against smokers.

When I was a college student, I smoked for just ten month.

It was absolutely great.

Though now I don't remember the feeling correctly, smoking after dinner or with drinking took me a paradise.

When I run out of tobacco, I went to the cafeteria of the student dormitory, broke curbstones in an ashtray, picked slice tobacco leaf out, and smoked again with a pipe. It looked like a wreck in a poppy cave.

So I can understand the feeling of smoker, in spite of the frightfulness of asthma.

But I am not tolerant anyone who smokes without common manner, you know.

-----

By the same theory,

As for a couple who are billing and cooing,

I can allow them to be such a disgraceful attitude.

And by the same theory,

As for absurd goofy runaway group with removing the silencer in the middle of the night, beyond the legal speed,

Even if I massacre all members of the group with machine gun, I cannot feel even pieces of compunction.

I am sure the above.

(Continued from yesterday)

Whenever I write "readme.txt" about my original software, I make the chapter of

"Firstly, make what I tell, as I tell you"

I ignore what the user want to make, for the first time.

An engineer can work something only one time. She/he might have the capability of change it to what she/he wants.

-----

Unfortunately, this approach seems not to be acceptable for many people, thought I think that it is the best way to start working something.

The manuals for engineers are also the same.

Japanese English teaching is also the same.

Though somebody hammers some ways of manuals or textbooks into our head, the products or English conversation does not start.

I think if we make one thing to work, it might be easy for us to expand it.

Last night, I was very tied of attending the explanatory meeting of an accident of my daughter's school.

So, I took strong sleeping tablets last night, and I was sleeping deeply like in sea of mud, and I could not notice the clock alarms.

I rose late this morning.

I sent the mail to the office, and I checked my today's schedule. I breathed a sigh of relief because no important event at today.

----

When I think about today's daily at the station now, I hear the announcement.

"The accident resulting in injury or death at Aikou-Ishida station now. We am sorry but we have to abandon the service of this train."

I don't feel a pain against the accident that happens any time with no question asked.

-----

Now I decide,

"The theme of next my serialisation is "suicide" after "diet"".

At the end of this month, I am going to have an meeting at the editorial department. I will present this new serialisation about "suicide".

-----

Let us talk genuinely.

(Continuation from yesterday)

In any case, the question of how to live is is a problem inherent in oneself without external interface.

Therefore, whenever I look at the title of book "How to live life", I think

"Noisy, bastard"

-----

I feel somewhat uncomfortable whenever I hear the term "outsource" and "sharing economy".

There are people who can work, operating device moving, and usable resources,

I do not care the boasting ""Recycling-oriented society" and "Digital Solutions".

Simply,

"Move to make me feel easy and entertain me,

I think.

-----

So, if someone try to make a 'Nice talk' such as 'reuse of resources'

about use or reuse of old digital gadgets,

I am going to send "Trojan horse" on their computer.

seriously.

I made a 100 million population simulator for Japan, as a weekend engineer.

Now, I am trying to make a new difficult simulation, because the objects of the simulation(persons and mobilises) keep moving on a map, and to tell you the truth,

I am crazed with the programming.

-----

The other day, when I found that more than 200 thousands person in my simulator were missing, I was about to give a scream.

In order to resolve this "200 thousands person's abduction", I kept searching these disappearance places. When I found the point, I came to lose my strength.

In addition, the next day, I found "three person's abduction", and I needed one day to find the position.

-----

I think this is rare case, however

"I am about to go off programming"

of my mental state.

-----

In my column serial, I make a simple simulator. So I can image the output of the simulation.

The counts of the target objects are more from dozens to one hundred at most.

However, even if the counts become "million", "10 million" and "1000 million", it becomes despairingly impossible to make a image of the movement.

-----

Now my computer continue to calculate the simulator with screaming, and

I also continue to debug with screaming

(Continuation from yesterday)

I think that a company using a shared printer (most companies will use it), was suspended for about half a day.

In this accident, 100%, I think that the total damage caused by this trouble due to Microsoft's negligence is probably exceeding that caused by a human injury accident in the metropolitan area.

However, within this range I examined, the messages of grudges against Microsoft's negligence, ----- I don't say "don't exist" ----- there was not as much as I expected.

Compared to the message of grudges against injuries, it can be said that "none exists.". Moreover, not to the person who committed suicide, but to the railroad company.

-----

Perhaps, I thought

"Is the world finally beginning to understand software?"

Therefore, it is correct that "it can not be distributed unless you correct it, unless you have done enough tests."

That is common sense of software that "updates that fix bugs are easy to generate another (catastrophic) defect"

If the world understands the fear and tediousness of software like this, it can be said that it is a "revolutionary advance".

But, well, perhaps, I do not think it is such a thing.

-----

The reason for "there is little message of grudge against Microsoft" - probably, it is like this.

- "Hey! This doesn't work!" with complaining to his subordinates,

- Calling the Information Systems Department and complaining "Hey! Somehow !!"

- Complaining "Hey! I can not print!" to the printer company,

It was completed with the action, "If there is an opponent who can be shouted there, they can only shout at it."

-----

If I think carefully, this is the same logic as "human injury".

It is exactly the same, without criticizing the "person in charge" that caused a human injury ( Because criticizing the dead will be criticized), they are getting angry with "railroad company" as an alternative.

In addition, in the case of software, I think that no one can reach until it is caused by "KB4480970".

In the end,

"The world still does not understand software"

I think that it is natural to think about it.

This is a story that appeared in an anime "a couple of science human, fell in love, so they try to prove the existence of love."

People who have little cooking experience, in many case, who are male in my observation, "hate" rather than "disgust" the term of

"small quantity" or "slightly"

For example, "Slightly salt", "Slightly sugar", "Slightly papper", etc.

Recently, taking this as a reverse hand, it seems that cookbooks with quantitative notation, "Ginger tube 5mm" have appeared.

-----

The word "slightly" is like, for example,

"Directory" for those who have never touched a personal computer,

or

"Wi-Fi" for people who have never touched a smartphone

In any case, "slightly" is definitely a term that is difficult to understand for beginners in cooking.

-----

The reason that the author of the recipe describes it as "slightly" is that they think

"The introduction of this seasoning dramatically changes the direction of the taste of the dish."

It means that they ask us to check the state of the dish before it is completed. In other words, "tasting during the cooking process" can be performed.

To begin with, cooking is performed by Agile development.

However, a beginner of cooking cannot taste the state of the cooking process, and estimate the taste of the final stage of cooking.

This is because beginners only recognize dishes as "final products".

"Cooking" is a black box until the dish is completed

This is what happens when performed in "Waterfall Development".

-----

I know well that the amount of salt and sugar (somewhat) determines the success of a dish (whether it can be eaten or not).

In particular, I know that "overdosing with salt" makes recovery difficult terribly".

However, my wife could recover my failed dish with another seasoning (although sometimes not be possible, of course).

In such a case, I cannot help but respect my wife, as a system engineer.

(Continuation from yesterday)

As far as I know, this kind of depiction is very rare in "Golgo 13".

The U.S. presidents in "Golgo 13" have been supposed to have a justifiable reason in their story, even if they have to do something that is against socially accepted justice.

The current president of the United States, however, is the only one who has not been portrayed as having this kind of "intelligence.

He is crude, dim-witted, and unable to control his ego -- to put it bluntly, I felt like he has been treated on par with a "low-life gangster".

Maybe I just happened to read such a story this time.

Still, as far as I know, I can't recall a story about a 'US President portrayed as a stupid'.

-----

Golgo 13" is one of the most famous contents in Japan with 50 years of serialization and 280 million copies sold.

I believe that the reason why "Golgo 13" has received so much support is because it has carefully followed the thoughts and feelings of readers in our country.

My hypothesis, derived from the above, is that

"Our people's assessment of the current U.S. president is about the same as that portrayed in Golgo 13.

(To be continued)

Today, my sister and I were working on a medical history tracking relay for my mother.

It was 10 years ago that my mother was admitted to a geriatric health care facility.

From there, I traced my mother's hospitalization history, visiting three different hospitals to find out more about her.

-Depressed skull fracture

-Depression

-Sinusoidal failure syndrome, pacemaker installation

-Insomnia

-Depressive cardiac insufficiency

-Cerebral infarction

-Expansion of gastrostomy

-Gallstones cholecystitis

-Femoral infarction sequelae

-Right elbow bruise

-Swallowing pneumonia

-Neurogenic bladder

-Exanthem subitum

-Pneumonia

-Chronic cardiac insufficiency additions

-Sinusoidal failure syndrome

-Swallowing pneumonia

-Death (January 10, 2022)

-----

This is the history of my mother's severe pain for the past ten years.

None of this falls under the current judicial "death with dignity" decision.

In the first place, my mother was not declared to die with dignity, so it is absolutely impossible.

After she stopped communicating with us, I had no idea what she was thinking.

-----

I would like to say one thing.

"Soon, the days of this torture will begin for you, too. And no one can escape from it"

In hindsight, it seems that my mother had two opportunities to stop this long torture from starting on her own.

One is "gastrostomy construction" and the other is "pacemaker installation.

These two things are the "wisdom" and at the same time the "curse" created by humanity.

Nevertheless, it was "my mother herself" who chose these two.

So - I don't need to worry about my mother anymore.

-----

But don't forget.

If you are unable to communicate, you will not be able to exercise your "right to choose death" at all (at least in the current judicial system).

This is an absolute fact.

The only person who can save you is yourself, and the opportunity is frighteningly difficult to grasp.

I gave a presentation last week with materials that I thought were well thought out, but during the Q&A session

"I don't understand"

I am now in a spectacularly depressed state after that.

At least, I was in a daze this past weekend, unable to muster the energy to do anything.

My weight dropped 1 kg in one day.

-----

However, I, at my age, 'understand' this "I don't know" very well.

I have no doubt that I have also used this phrase wildly in my company (especially at invention brainstorming sessions) for the past 10 years, and I made many people (especially younger people) depressed.

In that sense, it is probably quite important for seniors like me to be depressed by such harsh words from time to time.

But it is still hard to be depressed.

Even if it works for a diet.

Today, I asked my wife, who said, "I'm going to a Book-Off," to buy me a used metal bat.

Not because I'm interested in "baseball" (how could I be?), but to repel trespassers.

There is a golf club in the umbrella stand at the entrance of our house that was given to me by my father-in-law, and I have always thought, 'This has a weak ability to fight back.

I thought about buying it on Amazon, but then I thought, why pay the list price for a "bat for beating people up"?

-----

'Ebata, what the hell are you thinking?' You may be thinking, "What in the world is Ebata thinking?" but the reason for this has already been described.

In addition, I am preparing several other means of fighting back. However, I'll spare you the details. Because it is against public order and morals.